


x + y = y + x

by gentlelogic



Series: Sanders Sides Misc. Work [41]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mutual Pining, Obsessive Behavior
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-04-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:27:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23934553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gentlelogic/pseuds/gentlelogic
Summary: Logan believes in these three things: 1) There are things in life where the order in which you do them does not matter. 2) There are things in life where the order in which you do them does matter, but you can’t explain why. 3) There are things in life where the order in which you do them does matter, but you can explain why.Logan is trying to figure out which category “falling in love with Roman” fits under.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Logince
Series: Sanders Sides Misc. Work [41]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/906489
Comments: 52
Kudos: 164





	x + y = y + x

X + Y = Y + X. The commutative property of addition. Logan is familiar with the concept, has it jotted down in the edges of his mind where all the essential information lives. The commutative property of addition states that the order of numbers being added does not matter; it all yields the same result. 2 + 1 = 3, just as 1 + 2 = 3. Order does not matter. Logan understands that order is not required in everything.

However, in some instances, order does matter very much. 10 ÷ 5 ≠ 5 ÷10 or 10 – 5 ≠ 5 – 10.

Logan looks at his life like this: order does not matter in some instances. For example, it does not matter if he brushes his teeth or combs his hair first. It is inconsequential. Some things do require order in ways he cannot explain. He must smooth his hands over a notebook page before he can begin writing on it. He must click a pen an even number of times before he can set it down. He must tap the shampoo bottle against the shower wall in increments of three before using it. He must shake someone’s hand immediately after giving them his name, not a second before.

Last of all, there are things that must be done in a certain order that he _can_ explain. Before considering somebody his friend, he must be able to name at least ten facts about them at random that a stranger could not observe. This means he is aware of things about said person that others, perhaps, might be unaware of.

For example, he can list ten facts about Patton. They are:

  1. Patton is frightened of spiders.
  2. Patton is allergic to cats, but he loves them.
  3. Patton struggles with depression.
  4. Patton is a nostalgic person.
  5. Patton gives approximately ten (10), hugs per day (24 hours).
  6. Patton has been in love approximately five (5), times since Logan has met him (6 years).
  7. Patton is afraid of people not liking him.
  8. Patton has a fondness for puns, particularly ones that involve animals.
  9. Patton considers all his friends his “best friend,” however, he is particularly close with Virgil.
  10. Patton is the kindest person on the planet, and this might seem like it is a subjective fact, however, it is merely an objective truth.



Another form of order that matters is this: Logan must be able to name two secrets that no one else is aware of in order for him to consider someone a “best friend.” This means that he is trusted enough for someone to confide their secrets to him.

For example, he can list two secrets of Virgil’s:

  1. In the second grade, Virgil accidentally stole somebody’s wallet. It was sitting on the teacher’s desk and he had an untamable urge to touch it because it looked cool. Then once he had touched it, the teacher was coming back in the classroom, so he panicked and shoved it in his hoodie pocket. He had cried when he got home that day and his parents called the school for him. He gave it back the next day and his teacher forgave him, but Virgil still carries guilt for it to this day.
  2. Virgil has had a crush on Patton for two (2), years.



The last form of order that matters is this: In order for Logan to fall in love, he must be able to name five things that should be infuriating, but Logan is actually fond of. This means that he loves them so much that the things which should be annoying are sources of happiness to him.

He had never had any experience with this one. Until he met Roman.

-*-

  1. _An over-the-top personality._



Virgil sat across from Logan at a small coffee shop, sipping quietly at his vanilla latte, and staring tiredly into space. Logan would not like to say that he was staring at his friend, per se, but instead, merely observing. And if his observations were correct, Virgil’s mind was elsewhere.

“Virgil?”

Virgil looked up and shot Logan a smile. “Yeah, L?”

“Is everything all right?”

“I’m just tired. It’s been a long day.”

“It might be beneficial for you to talk about it, if you so desire it,” Logan said, stirring another packet of creamer into his coffee.

Virgil hummed, taking another drink of his coffee, then setting it down. “Management hired an idiot.”

“Oh dear.”

Virgil nodded sagely. “He’s a fucking clown if I’ve ever seen one, Logan. He’s infuriating. He talks too much. He calls me the stupidest nicknames. And he— _sings_. To the _customers_.”

Logan snorted into his coffee. “He _what_?”

“You—you think this is _funny_?”

“Moderately, yes.”

Virgil scowled. “If you were to meet him, maybe you wouldn’t be laughing like this.” The colour suddenly drained from Virgil’s face as he glanced up at the doorway to the shop. “Speak of the devil himself. Kill me now.”

“What is the matter? What’s…” Logan trailed off as a man stopped at their table with the biggest grin on his face. He was quite tall, wearing a red and white letterman jacket and a pair of black jeans. His wavy brown bangs flopped in his eyes as he leaned his right elbow onto their table.

“How’s it hanging, Hot Topic?” the stranger asked.

Logan could _hear_ the clank of Virgil’s teeth gritting. “What are you doing here, Roman?”

“Getting a coffee, like everyone else here.” Roman’s smile widened. “You didn’t tell me you had such good taste. Your boyfriend is gorgeous.”

It took Logan approximately ten seconds to recognize that Roman was talking about him and five extra seconds for his face to immediately heat.

“He’s not my boyfriend.”

“Oh, shame for you, but not for me. You have a name, Virgil’s not-boyfriend?”

Logan blinked. “I… Uhm.” Virgil looked between Roman and Logan, exasperation and horror dawning on his face. Logan swallowed. “Logan. My name is Logan.” Logan stuck his hand out.

Roman raised his eyebrows, but he clasped Logan’s hand and shook it.

“I’m Roman. I work with Virgil at the thrift store.”

“I am aware.”

“Oh, so he’s told you about me?” Roman asked with a smirk. “All good things, I hope.”

“Not a single one,” Logan said.

Roman laughed, loud and full. Logan didn’t know if his face could get any hotter. He didn’t want to test it either.

“Could I possibly have your number, Logan?”

Logan blinked. “You would like my phone number?”

Something in Roman’s face softened. “If you are uncomfortable with-”

“I’m not! I…” Logan coughed. Virgil rolled his eyes. “I would be willing to give you my phone number.”

“Fantastic!” Roman said, clapping his hands together. He pulled out his phone and handed it over to Logan. Logan tried to steady his fingers enough to type the number in, double and triple checking to make sure it was correct before handing it back over to Roman.

“I hope to see you two around again,” Roman said with a smile and a wave, walking over to the counter.

As soon as he was far enough away, Virgil dropped his head into his hands and groaned.

“Of all the outcomes—”

“Virgil—"

“You end up _liking_ him!”

“I… he is infuriating, just as you said,” Logan said faintly. “He is loud and obnoxious and arrogant.”

Virgil blinked and suddenly, his lips twisted into a fond smile. “Oh, Logan…”

“He is infuriating.”

“I know.”

“But I… _like_ him.” Logan adjusted his glasses carefully then folded his hands together in his lap. “I like him.”

Virgil merely grinned.

  1. _A disregard for order._



“I made pasta, if that’s all right with you,” Roman said as soon as he opened the door to his apartment. Logan stood in the doorway with his hands carefully clasped behind his back.

“Pasta is adequate.”

“Come on in, Specs.”

“Specs?” Logan asked, stepping into the apartment.

Roman gestured to Logan’s glasses and grinned when Logan exchanged another baffled look. Roman stepped into the small kitchen and Logan followed. A small table was set up with two dishes of pasta sitting across from each other.

“You nervous?” Roman asked, sitting down in one of the seats. Logan sat across from him, adjusting his glasses.

“No.”

“You look a little shaky,” Roman said sounding almost hesitant. “If this makes you uncomfortable—”

“It doesn’t.” Logan tried for a smile. “I do not usually… date.”

“And why is that?”

“I never have had much of an interest in doing so.”

“Until now?” Roman asked, smirking.

“I suppose that would not be… inaccurate to say, yes.”

Roman laughed. And then unfolded his napkin from around his silverware, dumping the spoon and fork unto the table before he picked up the fork and dug in. Logan stared, mouth open.

Roman raised his eyebrows when he looked up. “What’s the matter?”

“You… use your silverware incorrectly.”

Roman paused. “I… what?”

Logan unwrapped his napkin, carefully laid it out, set the silverware on top, then picked up the fork. “You should not let it touch the table.”

“Why not?”

“It is… I… do not know.”

Roman smiled. “Well, do you want me to rewrap it and do it again?”

“No! I am… merely observing.”

“I didn’t know you were observing things so closely.”

“I’m not,” Logan said with a blush and then stuffed a forkful of pasta into his mouth before he could say anything else that was so stupid it bordered on “clownery,” as Virgil would call it.

“So… you’re getting a degree in biochemistry?” Roman asked.

Logan nodded. “I am. You?”

“Oh, I am not going to school right now. I’m taking a gap year.”

“Ah. I often wish I had the ability to take a gap year.”

“There’s nothing stopping you.”

“I prefer to do things in a certain order. I have started my college education and I wish to complete it in the estimated time frame.”

Roman frowned, but he nodded. “You got a plan for everything, huh?”

“I do,” Logan said, finding a small smile crossing his face. “I have been planning on college since eighth grade.”

“How’s it all going for you? Your plans?”

“It is going well.”

Roman was silent, so Logan looked up to see Roman was gazing at him with something like fondness in his eyes. Logan looked back down.

“What do you plan to get your degree in? When you go back to school?” Logan asked.

“The dramatic arts.”

“You’re an actor?”

“Aspiring.”

Logan laughed.

“I know we didn’t plan for this… but, do you want to watch a movie with me after dinner?” Roman asked.

Logan froze.

“You don’t have to! So don’t feel pressured. I simply… wondered.”

“I think a movie would be adequate.”

Roman grinned. “Fantastic! We can watch Incredibles 2.”

“I have never seen the first one.”

Roman waved a hand. “That doesn’t matter.”

Logan’s mouth dropped. “It… matters quite a lot.”

“No, it doesn’t.”

“Yes—yes it does! You are… incorrigible.”

Roman was grinning again. “Am I?”

“Yes!”

“And yet…”

“And yet.”

They were staring at each other now, undeniably so. Roman’s eyes were a soft brown; had Logan not noticed that before? Slowly, Roman reached over the table and cupped Logan’s jaw.

“Can I kiss you?”

“This is our first date.”

“So?”

“We… we have to go on four more dates before we can kiss.”

Roman dropped his hand and laughed. “Okay. I respect that. But… why four?”

Logan blinked. “I… I don’t know. Four is a good number.”

They finished dinner with comfortable silence. And perhaps they ended up washing the dishes together. And maybe Roman splashed Logan with soap suds and maybe Logan went to splash Roman back but he tripped and Roman caught him. And maybe Logan gave Roman a light kiss on the cheek after Roman helped him gain his balance back. Maybe.

Logan would neither confirm nor deny.

  1. _A person seeing him cry._



Logan was exhausted. Finals were in full swing and despite the three espressos he had downed an hour ago, he felt like he was one push away from collapsing. Patton had come to Logan’s dorm room earlier and dropped off a sandwich, gave him a very big hug, and a message from Virgil to, “take a nap, Sanders.” Despite his friend’s request, Logan had not, in fact, taken a nap and he was feeling quite cranky and tired.

So tired, in fact, that he forgot to click his pen before setting it down. Which ruined everything somehow and his skin itched so bad and no matter how many times he ran his fingers through his hair and counted, the count wasn’t the right number, so he found himself on the floor, counting, over and over, trying to keep himself settled enough that he didn’t do something stupid like see how many lines he could etch into his skin before he got the “right” number.

He didn’t stop until there was a quiet knock at the door. Logan froze.

“It’s Roman. May I come in?”

“The door is unlocked.”

The door swung open and Roman stood there, holding a little vase that had three daisies inside of it. Roman smiled, very softly, and set the vase on the nightstand once he came inside.

“Virgil texted me and said you were having a bad day. So, I got you some flowers.”

“They are beautiful, Roman. But I believe it is to your detriment to be here right now.”

“Why’s that?”

“I am… for lack of a better word, a big mess.”

Roman nodded seriously. “You sure are. But that’s okay.”

Despite himself, Logan laughed. “Roman, you are so vastly incorrect. Nothing is okay.”

Roman crouched down and reached his hand out. Slowly, Logan took it. He flinched at how red his hand was in comparison to Roman’s light brown ones.

“Darling,” Roman breathed.

“This is so far beyond you,” Logan choked. “It is so far beyond even me. You do not have to _be here_.”

“I don’t have to be here, but I want to be. And if you want me to leave, I will respect it, but I would rather stay.”

Logan opened and closed his mouth. Then: “I didn’t click my pen before I set it down. And I cannot find a good number.” As if that explained _anything_.

Roman nodded solemnly. “Pens are nasty villains anyhow.”

Logan blinked. “Roman, pens cannot be villains. They do not have consciousness.”

“They do too. I think it’s rude of you to dismiss pens like that.”

“ _Roman_.”

“Oh, my sweet nerd,” Roman said and then Logan realized he was _crying_ of all humiliating things. Roman cupped his face and Logan didn’t complain as Roman placed a gentle kiss to his forehead.

“You don’t have to be here,” Logan gasped.

“And yet…”

“And yet.” More tears dripped down Logan’s face. 

“Did you try 8?”

“8?”

“8’s a good number,” Roman said.

Logan shook his head vehemently. “8 is an awful number, Roman.”

“Name a number better than 8.”

“10, for starters.”

And perhaps Roman didn’t make everything better. But he sure managed to help, somehow.

  1. _Random bursts of song._



Logan did not tend to disturb Virgil at work all that often. However, for some reason, he had an urge to shop for a new tie, so he decided to go into the little thrift store and see if they had any feasible options.

“L!” Virgil said when Logan walked through the door. Virgil was smiling warmly at him. “What’re you doing in here?”

“I think I want to purchase a new tie.”

“Well, have a look around.” Virgil leaned over the counter. “How’re you doing though? I know finals season was… rough this year.”

“I… am seeing my therapist concerning everything. I am feeling considerably better,” Logan said quietly. He fidgeted with his glasses, then dropped his hand onto the counter. “Roman uh. Saw me.”

Virgil frowned. “I don’t follow.”

“He saw me at a low point.” Realization dawned on Virgil’s face. “But he hasn’t stopped asking me on dates. He keeps texting me.” Logan’s voice lowered even more. “I like him, Virgil.”

“You’ve mentioned that a time or two.” Virgil smirked. “And so has he.”

Logan’s face lit up. “He has?”

“He has.”

Then, almost as if he had been summoned, Roman burst forth from the backroom. “Logan!”

Virgil groaned. “Talk a little louder, Princey, I don’t think the whole town quite heard you.”

Roman laughed and leaned over the counter. “How do you feel about a movie tonight, Specs?”

“That sounds pleasant.”

“Well good!” Roman leaned closer and Virgil sighed, stepping away.

“I’m going to take a fifteen. Don’t fucking sing to any customers or I’ll slaughter you, Princey.”

“I wouldn’t dare.” Virgil glared, then disappeared into the backroom. Roman turned back to Logan. “I’ve been thinking…”

“ _You_?” Logan asked.

“Yes, me,” Roman said. He took a deep breath and Logan noticed that Roman looked nervous, of all things. “I have a question for you.”

“Oh?”

“Yes.” Roman ran a hand through his hair, then took Logan’s hand. “We’ve been going on dates for a couple months now… and I feel like I’ve gotten to know you very well. And I… I wanted to know. If you wanted to be my boyfriend.”

Logan blinked. “Me?”

“There’s no one else here, honey.”

“You want… me to be your boyfriend?”

“I thought I’d made that clear,” Roman said.

“Yes. _Yes,_ Roman I want that very much.”

To Logan’s astonishment, Roman jumped up and whooped. Logan felt a smile spreading across his own face when Roman jumped over the counter and twirled Logan around dramatically and began singing something that Logan faintly recognized from one of the Disney movies they’d watched together.

The back door flung open. “Roman! What have I said about your _singing_ —Logan! You’re encouraging this?”

“I am not,” Logan said, but the way Roman’s arms were wrapped around him and Logan’s flushed cheeks were not supporting his argument very much.

  1. _Overusing the words, “I love you.”_



Logan could not believe he was doing it. And yet, there he was, sitting across from Roman, watching as Roman rambled on and on about some new poem he had read and Logan was just filled with so much affection and adoration, that he felt like he was going to burst.

And here’s the thing: he had a plan. He was going to ask Roman to dinner. He was going to kiss him. Then he was going to tell him.

But no, they were just sitting across from each other on Logan’s dorm floor and Logan couldn’t think because—

“Roman.”

Roan stopped talking and smiled. “Yes, my love.”

“I… I love you,” Logan said.

Roman blinked, mouth agape. And then Logan was being tackled and kisses pressed sloppily to his mouth and cheeks and then forehead.

“Oh my darling, I love you too.”

“You are being far too dramatic about this—”

“I love you, I love you, I love you. Oh, I love you, Logan!”

“You mentioned.”

“Aw, you’re blushing!”

“I am not.”

Roman laughed and pressed one more kiss to Logan’s lips, then pulled away. “I love you.”

“You are unbearable.”

“And yet…”

“And yet, I love you anyway.”

**Author's Note:**

> I’m not even shitting you, this whole fic idea came about when I was thinking about the commutative property of addition.
> 
> Feedback is always appreciated!


End file.
